Itachi's Revenge
by BansheeFromHell
Summary: Two months after the 'Owie' incident. Everything is - for the most part - back to normal. There's only one problem: Itachi is itching for some payback - but it's not the kind you'd expect.


**Banshee: Hi everybody! I made a little oneshot that's a sequel to 'Owie.' I hope you like it.**

**Disclaimer: I only own my OC and the plot.**

* * *

><p>Two months after the 'Owie' incident.<p>

Everything returned to normal, for the most part; some members acted nervous around me, and any interactions between us were just plain awkward. This was especially the case with Itachi.

Usually he tried to avoid me as much as possible because I annoyed the crap out of him, but lately he's been either following me around or watching me like a hawk when we were in the same room. He wasn't just staring, either. The look in his eyes screamed "_**REVENGE**_!" - but revenge for what?

Oh yeah... now I remember...

...

- TWO MONTHS AGO -

...

_"Are you sure about this, Tobi?" I asked, as Tobi and I peeked around the corner, watching Itachi paint his fingernails._

_Yes. The Akatsuki paints their fingernails. I think it's part of the uniform, or something…_

_You might as well get all the laughs out of you system now._

_"Yup," Tobi replied, nodding. "Itachi-san has an owie too. I'll show you."_

_He tugged me over to Itachi, who decided to ignore us and continue painting his nails, and pointed to a spot under his left eye. There was a bruise forming there, but it was barely anything to be concerned about._

_"See? Right here. He got that when he went on that mission yesterday."_

_"What are you two idiots_ doing_?" Itachi asked - more like _demanded_, as he slapped Tobi's hand away and glared at us._

_When we didn't respond, he sighed, shook his head, and went back to painting his nails. He was caught off guard when I planted a small kiss on his cheek, right on the bruise, as his face was slowly being covered in a blush. I grabbed Tobi's hand and dragged him out of the room before Itachi could recover and chase after us._

_"… I'll never understand those two…" He muttered to himself, after he recovered from his stupor._

_It was then that he noticed that the brush he was using shifted during his moment of shock and it left a - blatantly - noticeable trail of black nail polish across his finger. He stared at said finger grimly, with a murderous look in his eyes, promising himself that he would get me back for distracting him._

...

- PRESENT -

...

What was he going to do? Kill me? Use his Sharingan and make me go through seventy-two hours of torture in five minutes?

Whatever he had planned, I didn't want to find out.

In order to avoid the Uchiha, I hung around Sasori, Deidara and Tobi as much as possible. I couldn't really trust any of the other members; not with my life, anyway. Sasori may be a cold emotionless bastard, but he's fine with me as long as I don't get in his way. Deidara and I have a love/hate relationship going on; sometimes I like him, sometimes he drives me insane with his exploding clay and all his talk about how the true beauty of art is fleeting, and all that jazz. Tobi is a coward and an idiot, but I'd take an idiot over a murderous psychopath any day.

"WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU'RE LEAVING?" I shrieked, having just found out that my three protectors were being sent on a day-long mission.

"What're you getting so worked up for, un? We'll only be gone for a day." After thinking about it for a moment, Deidara's visible eye suddenly twinkled mischievously as he gave me a sly smirk. "Oh, I get it. You're so in love with me that you can't bear to see me go. If you'll miss me that much, I can always give you a goodbye kiss..."

"Get over yourself." I growled, punching him in the face.

"You didn't answer the question." Said Sasori. "Why are you throwing a fit over this?"

"Itachi's plotting to kill me!"

At my outburst, Deidara started laughing.

"Itachi? Plotting to kill _you_?" He chuckled. "Yeah right, un. Why would he waste his abilities on somebody like you?"

"I can't believe I'm saying this, but I agree with Deidara." Sasori agreed. "As far as our leader is concerned, your only purpose is to lure in the Nine-tails. Other than that, you're nothing; you're worth about as much as the dirt beneath our feet. Itachi wouldn't waste his time killing you. In fact, none of the other members would even bother with you - except for Hidan, but he's a drooling moron that would kill anyone for his god."

"Gee, thanks, guys… That really helps my self-esteem…" I muttered sarcastically.

"You're not worthless to me, Saru-chan." Tobi said, trying to cheer me up.

"Thanks, Tobi. That helped… a little… I think.."

"We're leaving." Said Sasori. "Try not to get into too much trouble. And try not to die."

"I thought you said I wasn't worth killing." I reminded him of what he said earlier.

"You're not." He deadpanned. "When I said 'try not to die,' I was referring to household accidents."

"Go jump in a wood chipper." I growled.

Sasori glared at me, and he, Tobi, and Deidara left on their mission.

…

- Six Hours Later -

…

If Itachi was going to kill me, I wish he'd get it over with instead of torturing me by making me wait for several hours. Now I know why Sasori is so impatient.

Every time I heard footsteps by my door, I hid under the bed waiting for Itachi to come in and kill me. But they were only the other members just walking down the hallway.

God, I was a nervous wreck. And sitting there waiting to be killed sure worked up an appetite. As much as I didn't want to leave my room, I was hungry as hell. Anybody who's about to die is given a last meal, right? So I might as well have mine.

I quietly left the room and headed towards the kitchen. I eventually reached it, and made a beeline for the fridge.

"Ooh, pizza~." I mused, after noticing a box of pizza on one of the shelves. I took the box out of the fridge and opened it, pouting when I saw that there was only one piece left.

"Only one piece? Oh well. Something's better than nothing."

I took the lone pizza slice and threw the box into the trash can. I ate the pizza slice, and I heard my stomach let out a satisfied grumble when it received the food. When I finished the slice, I realized that it wouldn't be enough to keep my stomach satisfied for very long. I looked around to find something else to eat, but a familiar presence that suddenly appeared behind me made me freeze. Looking behind me, I saw, none other than, Itachi Uchiha.

"Oh, uh… Hey Itachi…"

He said nothing, and continued to stare at me with that freaky look in his eyes.

"Um… I'm just gonna take these," I grabbed a bag of chips. "and go. See ya."

I bolted out of the kitchen and down the hallway. As soon as I was back in my room, I shut the door and sat down on the bed. In the twenty minutes that passed, I ate the whole bag of chips.

Not even two minutes later, the door opened and Itachi walked into the room. He shut the door and stalked towards me, and I backed up until I found myself between him and a wall. His hand lashed out and grabbed me by my collar, and one thought that was going through my head was 'Oh shit, I'm going to die.'

"It's time for you to get what you deserve.."

I closed my eyes and waited for my inevitable death, hoping that he would be kind enough to make it quick and painless, only to open them again when I felt his mouth on mine.

It was very short; just a little peck on the lips.

"We're even now." He said.

With that, he left.

I was confused as hell. Itachi Uchiha, the man responsible for the massacre of the entire Uchiha clan, an S-ranked criminal and a traitor, and member of a criminal organization known as the 'Akatsuki,' just _kissed_ me.

"Well that was unexpected.." I said to myself.

I went through the rest of the day reading, waiting for Deidara, Sasori and Tobi to get back. I was interested in seeing what their reactions would be when I told them that Itachi kissed me.

…

- Later -

…

When Sasori, Deidara and Tobi returned from their mission, I told them what happened with Itachi.

"ITACHI DID _**WHAT**_?"

Deidara screamed so loud, I had to cover my ears.

"Calm down, fool." Sasori ordered. "I fail to see how Itachi kissing Saru is such a big deal."

"It really wasn't that big of a deal." I agreed with the puppet master. "I already kissed him before."

"You kissed him… b-before?" The blonde stuttered.

"Yeah. I kissed everyone in the Akatsuki," I said. "_right_ Sasori?"

Sasori said nothing. He just turned away.

"You sure have kissed a lot of people, haven't you Saru-chan? You are such a floozy~!" Tobi giggled.

"It was _your _idea to share my 'healing kisses' with the rest of the Akatsuki in the first place, you idiot! Besides, do you even know what the word 'floozy' means?" I asked.

"Uh…"

"I'll take that as a 'no.'"

"Tch. Idiot." Deidara grumbled. He turned to me and said, "So… You said you kissed everyone in the Akatsuki…"

"Yeah."

"Everybody?" He asked.

"Everybody." I confirmed.

"Even the blue-haired chick?"

"Yes. Even Konan."

"You kissed another girl? … That's hot, un."

Even Sasori cringed when I punched Deidara in the face.

I growled and stormed out of the room, and Sasori rolled his eyes as the blonde recovered from the hit, rubbing the spot where he was punched.

"You're such a pervert, Senpai." Said Tobi.

"Shut up, Tobi-baka." Deidara growled.

…

…


End file.
